Wednesday, December 02, 2009

I'm going Dave Barry

Degan here. I was thinking recently that I have no unique talents or interests. The only thing truly unique about me is that I see funny stuff every day.

Observations of a mad man about his world:

My 3-year old loves to pee, whether it be in public places like trees, rocks, etc., or a
public restroom--and he refuses help even when he needs it.
Like all men, I think he finds a tremendous amount of empowerment in having control out of any little portion of the universe.

I saw a guy with a peace sign on his car flip off a guy on the way to work the other day. Classic.

I'm a person that doesn't believe in gun control. I'm also planning on teaching students
at a University some day. A student asked me if I was in favor of gun control on campuses.
I stopped and thought about the fact that our current state allows people to carry guns and
it hasn't hurt us so far. But on the other hand, a gun on campus just doesn't seem very
necessary. Then the student mentioned to me that 1 in 5 people are considered crazy, and many
of them are on college campuses. Considering the incredible stress I am under at times, and the
fact that a student killed his professor last month, I think I'll side with not needing guns
on campuses. On the other hand, it would be pretty cool if professors carried them. Colt 45 baby. Nobody will accuse this Colenel Sanders about having a problem with his medula oblomgota.

Embarrassment seems like a pretty common way for people to try and change the behavior of others. Cool kids make fun of the poor ones, hoping the poor ones will act cooler. Non-smokers make fun of smokers, thinking that will shame them into changing. Skinny people ridicule fat people thinking it will do the same. Same thing happens in politics. After the lastest family holiday when I was the brunt of mockery, I did some introspection and realized that making fun of people really doesn't ever help. It breeds hurt and resentment.

I took my daughters 7 and 9 to a Greek and Roman art exhibit hoping to bring them some culture. They were disgusted by the naked men statues and demanded to know why mom and dad could like such a thing.

My daughter things I make stinky farts. She now calls me Fartchito (Fart-cheetoh).

Black Friday is a yearly event that takes everything men hate about shopping and amplifies it. In a case of reality being stranger than fiction, I agreed to go with my family to the mall, in Los Angeles, on Black Friday, without having fed my 3 children lunch. And then proceeded to try and shop. It took me 30 minutes just to get up the parking ramp to find parking. The day didn't get any better. What were we thinking?